Relationships With Resilience

Guest Article by: Christopher Knippers, Ph.D.

People who have close connections with other people and are resilient against the many disappointments that can occur in relationships have a significant buffer against anxiety and depression, and are shown in scientific research to live much longer, healthier lives.

It is so easy for any relationship to go astray when we allow our own hidden insecurities and buried resentments from the past to interfere. We must first look at our own part in a relationship conflict before judging the other person.

Here are 9 qualities to develop in yourself and your relationships in order to experience the healing and ultimate fulfillment that comes from a relationship in which there is a true soul connection:

1. Respect. Have respect for the other person regardless of the behaviors they are manifesting.

2. Listen. Being heard without judgment or an agenda on the part of the listener is a very rare experience for most people. Being truly heard is highly valued by those who experience it. Listen not only with your ears, but also with your heart, intuition, and soul.

3. See the potential that this person possesses inside.

4. Be kind. Even loving people have bad days or make momentary mistakes. Just be kind.

5. Be honest. Speak the truth about yourself, your thoughts, and your emotions to the people who are close to you.

6. Assertiveness: Take the responsibility to make sure your personal needs and rights are being respected.

7. Tolerance: Criticism will kill any relationship. Learn to tolerate differences and imperfections. We all have them.

8. Value and Affirm: Freely compliment everyone who has chosen to be part of your life.

9. Relationship with Higher Power/God is vital for the miracles of good relationships to be able to manifest.