Relationships Can Hurt

There are times in our life where we feel hurt, misunderstood, disrespected, or put-down. Where do these feelings come from and what are we supposed to do with them? First of all, your feelings are just that—your feelings.  It’s what you do with your feelings (your behavior) that matters.

Sometimes relationships you know, love, and trust, accidentally wound you with their words or actions. Or maybe they are having a bad day and are lashing out at you because you are “safe”, and they assume you won’t leave them.

Other times, because of someone’s lack of understanding or their disrespect for you, their comments or reactions are purposely offensive and hurtful. (You should have few of these friends in your life).

It’s important that you get to a point where you can identify what pushes your “hot buttons” of hurt and anger, realizing your buttons don’t necessarily affect others the same. They have different buttons. We all do.

Everyone carries messages, hurts, and offenses from the past and what wounded you before can do the same now, depending on how you have dealt with your past wounds.

When you feel hurt or wounded try to identify where in your past that same kind of hurt and anger negatively affected you. Take some time and realize that what offends you today may pale in comparison to what was said to you in elementary school, yet your internal, emotional reaction is similar.

Once you identify why certain things are hurtful to you, you can start to grow, learn, and heal. But first you must be willing to examine yourself, your life, and your past wounds.  You will let go of your negative, toxic relationships while you grow the ones that are healthy, strong, and bring out the best in you.